Thursday, April 11, 2013

babies out of the bag.....

For some reason I wanted to wait until my 20 weeks ultrasound to tell everyone about the twins.... Slowly I've gotten a little more used to the idea and with each good ultrasound I gain more confidence to tell others.   So the babies are out of the bag at work and with our friends and family...  now just have good ol' Facebook to tell and the world will know all about it..  My fears and hopes keep getting jumbled up!

I have been worried for weeks but yet there they are... flickering on the ultrasound perfect and happy.   The dreams I've been having are all about the babies being born a different nationality.  Perhaps it is my fear of connection too soon to the little Jean beans that is making me distance myself from them.. just enough to continue to protect my heart but not far enough away to disregard them.   I am careful and cautions.   I am not tender yet or in tune with them in anyway.   I see them with my own eyes and yet do not seem to connect them into my body... not yet... I will... give it time.   day by day and week by week they are proven fighters.  Champions for Frozen Embryo's everywhere... they can make it... and they chose me to be the mom.   I in every ounce of my being know that this is meant to be.... Why am I so guarded as to tell everyone?  I want to tell everyone that I am caring a very very special delivery..  Twins... Twins...  Maybe if I write it enough times it will sink in.... Maybe I just need to buy something for them.   I will go today at lunch and see if there is something I can cherish.. something to all their own..  my twins. 

Here is the picture we are going to use to make the "official" announcement.

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