11 years ago my husband and I finally had a house with a backyard and could get a dog. Significant because we had wanted so badly to have one.. neither of us had the chance to grow up with a dog due to one thing or another. We were so excited and had NO clue how to go about this whole thing... so we looked in the paper.. I KNOW now how terrible that decision was but.. hey we never will make that mistake again... unless it is a rescue add. Anyway - we pulled into what turned out to be a puppy mills home.. Lab was the 5th or so breed of dog they just "happened" to have available as a puppy this time. Out of the door bounded this black ball of perfection.. She had long ears.. and simply sat on my husbands foot.. She was to be ours forever. Little did we know she was a mixed breed (yes we were scammed) but I'm so happy she became ours. We nursed her back to health and she became our world that day.. she still is. I've always had a furry faced daughter and she no more thinks she is a dog then I do.
Emma girl is now in the eve of her life. A few weeks ago she stopped eating.. we changed her diet and got her all the love an attention we could at the vet. They told us her little blood levels for pancriatitus and liver were not good.. She simply is just old. She had been eating the new food we got her but not enthusiastically ... she is slowing down. her sparkle is gone but not completely.. She loves.. she cuddles and she shines in my heart. She sleeps now 22 hours a day only to get up for a slow bark or a quick drink.. maybe to step outside but barley. I have been home for so many weeks... seeing her change has seemed so sudden. I suspect she has been doing this a lot longer than I've known...
I sit with little tears for her as I see she is holding on.. for us... for the baby.. for something.. not sure yet what. I keep hoping she will turn it around that she will spunk up and run over in her regular way.. I know that is not likely.. I know that her time may be nearing the end... With Grace I will let her go.. My First child.. although furry faced... she has been such a blessing in our lives..
Emma: You have kissed every tear I've had.. you have shown me such love and care.. Your sweet face forever makes me smile. Let us know when it is time for you to go.. we will go with you and hold you until you leave this place. I think all dogs go to heaven.. and you will meet your brother Joseph. That thought makes me smile.. You can help me mother him from there.. little lady loo whoo.. it is okay to let go.. you are brave and strong.. the leader of our house.. the one who rules the roost and keeps track of time (and cookies) She who seeks out the best in us.. we now do the same for you. All of my love..mom.
Emma will go to the hospital tomorrow.. and we will wait and see.. and wait and see.. I pray for peace for this most precious of animals.. she has been the most perfect joy in our lives for so long.