Monday, November 8, 2010

Doppler

So in order to squelch the total panic and worry in my mind we have a home Doppler. It is the exact model that my OB uses and let me tell you THIS is a gem. Given all the issues and craziness that are layered into my pregnancy I felt this was the best thing I could do for piece of mind. Most people just worry about their baby when pregnant. A lot of you know what I mean when I say worry is an understatement lost... is more like it.... I had to worry about my son in heaven... then going through and paying for (all out of pocket) one round of FET and then a full on cycle of IVF in order to get pregnant again...I am lucky so not complaining about that just more worry that is all.........Then I get To worry more because of complications that arise just from those things.. Now add unrelated issues of sub chorionic bleeding.. placenta previa.. and little Jon's kidney issues it is no wonder I don't just sit on the steps of the hospital begging the maternity triage to take me early! I have to wait until I am 22 weeks (18 now) until the hospital will see me directly. In the mean time I have my High Risk Facility and Ob office on speed dial. Gladly for the sake of all others this Doppler has stopped some of the madness. Whenever I'm feeling worry/ wonder and panic due to (see any above reason) I just sit back and listen to the swift sound of the swhoop whoop of little Jon's heart and all is right with the world. I wait for my newest downs test blood work to come in this week and then pray so hard that little Jon's kidneys are improving for our next ultrasound scheduled on the 18th... Did I tell you all to top this all off I was promoted at work? I know.... boy let me tell you I KNOW...

Joseph can you hear mommy? We visited you yesterday your dad and I and all the things at your big boy place are so pretty. I love you my son and miss you daily - mom

Little Jon are you listening? Grow those kidney's... pee for me.... and unblock that silly problem - you can do it little one.. I believe in you and us... Love is not a big enough word - mommy

6 comments:

Lisette said...

Yes having a doppler is a wonder!!! I know it doesn't easy all the worrying but it sure does help. Can't wait for the 18th, praying and praying for you and little Jon ((HUGS)).

Salma said...

Hang in there...I'm praying for you all.

Jenn said...

Brandy, I am praying for you and little Jon. I'm so sorry that you have had all these things to worry about- if anyone deserves an easy pregnancy it's you! I'm glad you have the home doppler though. I had one when we were pregnant with Leah and it was a blessing. Congratulations on your promotion at work too!

Jill said...

I never go anywhere without the doppler! It is such a gem just like you mentioned. Glad you are finding some comfort with it. Always thinking about you!!!

Ashley said...

I can say that I truly believe, God knew how hard you would work for your babies. He knew you would succeed in this trial, and your children will be blessed forever to have a mother like you. What a trust he has in you, to take on all these hard things, and still want to bring his dearest children here to hold in your arms, and your heart. You are a blessing to everyone who knows you. Love your guts!

elena said...

Glad you were able to get a doppler at home. Keeping you in my prayers. *hugs*