Saturday, October 2, 2010
I was not expecting October to come. I didn't want to turn that page and see that the month is October. It happened anyway. I watched as I wrote in my own hand his birthday... and his memorial on the loving spots they will arrive. I sobbed as I saw my hand shake.. a tremble in my soul. Although I am so proud of him and all that he has touched this past year.. I am missing him. So many new friends have come into my life making it more rich than I could have imagined... So many people have reached out and voiced hope and love I almost can't keep count. Of loves that have lost his was great. A piece of my heart never to return went to heaven with him. I don't mind.. For my hole has healed with new light and a life I would have never known. Tears of remembering him slip slowly past my cheek and drip under my chin... but once they touch my heart I know a love that is unstoppable.
Joseph can you hear mommy? I miss you little one. I love you more than the world has air. I can feel you smiling down on me... mom.
Put are you listening? Your big brother is helping you I know.. helping you just like a big brother should. I love you...stay baby stay... mommy
at 9:26 AM