Wednesday, April 7, 2010


Don't hold your head down when you pass by me... hold it up high. Talk to me about your children.. I want to hear how they are.. For some reason people seem to think I have leprosy or some strange disease... When other people find out they are pregnant.. They are afraid to tell me... like I'm going to jump out and turn into some sort of crazy person on them.. This is what makes me sad.. I WANT to be a mother to a child on earth.. I WANT to enlarge my family... I'd like to be invited to showers and birthday parties. Just because my baby died doesn't mean that you push me away. Sure I may cry when you mention his name but I love children... I love to play with them.. babysit them.. hold them and yes I would love to know you are expecting.. Don't forget me because it is sad that I don't have what you do... I will one day. Don't count me out because I can't bring my child to your play date. Don't spare my feelings because you should be excited to bring a little one safe into this world. Don't let me down... I'm already down there..

Joseph... can you hear mommy? I know you can.. I'm glad we have our happy times together.. we have our own play dates and parties in our own way. Celebrate one with me today... my baby.. I love you no matter what. Mom.


lis said...

im right there with you sweetie. maybe one day we can have our own play date with our rainbow babies? id like that.


Salma said...

So true, I know what you mean.

Thinking of you today. Your Rainbow will come Brandy. Until then, you are in my heart and prayers.

Ashley said...

beautifully put. I will never begrudge another woman for becoming a mother again and again...and again... :o)

Maureen said...

This is why I follow you. You don't feel sorry for yourself. You are REAL!!!! You have feelings, cry, and maybe sad sometime but you know God has a plan for your life and you are waiting on him. I admire you for that because that is not so easy. God Bless you Brandy and I think you are the BEST!!!!!!! Blessings, your Sister in Christ, Maureen